Doing the Best I Can...

Brene Brown’s book “Rising Strong” is an incredible read. For those who you who are unaware of her work on Vulnerability, I highly suggest you watch her TED talk or pick up one of her books. Her message is profound.

In this particular book one of the topics she discusses is the idea that everyone is “Doing the Best they can”.

 Now, one example where I have this mindset is with my parents. When I was younger they were frustrated and concerned with my food consumption and childhood weight - an issue they tried to confront in often unproductive ways. With hindsight though, they both wish they had approached things very differently. But I’ve always accepted that they were doing the best they could at that particular moment based on who they were and what they knew..

However, through all these years I have never really applied that idea to myself. I have always felt a sense of expectation and self-judgment. I should be a better mother and work harder. I should have accomplished more for where and who I am today.....And in speaking with others they also share the same sentiment.....We should be better....  

Then, last night at 2am, I awoke and could not sleep so I tackled some emails and decided to read some of Brene's book.

As I read her section on understanding others and doing their best,  the sentence “YOU also were doing your best in that moment” stopped me mid sentence.. 

I really let it sink in.... in all my imperfect choices, and decisions I too was also doing the best I could at that moment….

Then why is it so difficult to give ourselves a break if we can offer it to others?

Especially as parents, we have such a huge responsibility in raising these little people. When I look at my daughter, I hope she grows up to be compassionate to others and more importantly, compassionate to herself. Leading by example and teaching her that although I am not always right Mommy is trying her best, is the key to her applying this lesson in her own life.

So, I will continue to raise the bar and march in the direction of my dreams. 
But what do I know for sure? 
Going forward when I start to feel self-doubt kick in I will repeat….

”I am doing and have done the best I can in every moment……and that is all I can ever do…..”

                                                                     

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