Thursday, 19 November 2015

Intuition....Listen to the Whisper

Last year I sat in two different cities listening to Oprah speak at the “Live Your Best Life Tour”.
One of the points she really drummed home to the audience was acknowledging and listening to your gut feeling. This is not a new concept to me. I am sure you can all relate to different times in your life when something just does not feel right.
What usually starts as a whisper or a questioning “hummmm”.  If we do not listen to this quiet voice it will have the tendency to turn to a shout. Then if you still do not pay attention it eventually will become a hit upside the head.
 Whether it be work, friendship, relationships, or just even something random. Becoming attuned how your body responds to different circumstances can act as your compass in life. I know I actually feel it physically in my gut and time and time again my intuition has proven to be correct.
 Rather than ignoring or pushing this feeling aside if we can respect our intuition it can essentially save us wasted time and effort.
What I know for sure is I have got the lesson to honor my intuition.


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Wednesday, 4 November 2015

Faith and Prayer

I was raised in a Christian household.  I grew up with the Bible, prayer, and an understanding that there is something greater then myself.
As I have grown older I have formulated my own beliefs and faith practices. My daughter currently attends a Christian Seventh Day Adventist school.  Christianity is so interwoven through our culture, I want her to have an appreciation of the Bible and it’s message, although I don’t believe there is just one way to connect with God or the Universal power. There is something to be said about the message. I have always loved the definition of GOD as Good Orderly Direction and learning to tap into that will never lead you astray.

During difficult times knowing that I have something to turn to has been my saving grace.  Prayer and faith has pulled me through. I may not understand the reasons behind certain events or circumstances, but I trust that a power far greater than myself is at work.
We all have different ways to connect with this Greater power, energy, or whatever you call it. Teaching my daughter that we are not alone even in our darkest hours can hopefully enable her to push through and always see the light. I know for my own journey it has been paramount.

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Tuesday, 27 October 2015

The Night Time Words...

As parents we all have some special nighttime ritual we do for our children. Either a tickle time before bed, a special book, a prayer, or kisses and I love you's.
Since Mekaella was three I have said the “Night Time Words” to her. She loves them, for the times when I am away from home I call and recite them.
They are always followed by a song that I have made just for her, with the music from “Can’t help loving that Man (Mekaella) of mine”

So I thought I would share with you our nighttime rituals:

Night Time Words: 
"Mekaella….You are strong and powerful.  Mommy loves you, Annie loves you, Grandpa and Grandma love you and you love and believe in yourself.
You can accomplish any of your dreams as long as you work hard towards your goals. So take a deep breath and close your eyes and think of thoughts that make you happy."

"Fish Gotta Swim and Birds gotta fly I gotta love Mekaella all my life. Can’t help loving that girl of mine.
She is so brilliant, she is so great. She is so smart she knows how to create. Can’t help loving that girl of mine.
When she goes away…..That’s a rainy day….but when she comes back that day is fine…..
Cause Fish Gotta Swim and Birds gotta fly…I gotta love Mekaella all my life…..Can’t help loving that girl of mine…"

Being a parent is a tough job. We are all trying our best to raise happy, healthy, kind children.
As she grows older I hope remembers the words spoken and sang to her each evening….moreso I hope she believes them…

                                Bedtime with the Munchkin.....

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Monday, 12 October 2015


We have all heard the saying “No Regrets.” I have used it on various occasions and posts. However, as of recent my outlook on regrets as changed.
Like others, I have tried to avoid regrets and make sure I was living life to the fullest. I now believe to live a fulfilling, authentic life of purpose regrets are inevitable.
When you look up the word regret, other words associated with this term are; anguish, annoyance, bitterness, heartache, and discomfort. These are emotions we do not pursue, but I know in my life it is when I am uncomfortable it results in self-reflection and growth.
We all have times we wish we could take back, a fight, a moment in which you should have said something different, a job loss, an ending of friendship, or staying in an unfulfilling relationship that no longer serves you. It is in those moments if we can look at our actions breakthroughs can occur. Often similar patterns will continue to show up over and over until we stop and reflect.
If we can learn from our past “lessons” then it can change the trajectory of your life.

So in short I don’t want a life of regret but I want a life of growth. This usually means having some regrets along the way.

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Sunday, 4 October 2015

Parenting....The Shift....

Had you asked me 8 years ago what my most valued job was or where I saw my future I would say being a Top Account Manager and then National Sales Manager.  Truthfully, my goal was never to be a mother. I never was someone who got excited to see babies. (Puppies yes…. Babies not so much)

Ask me that question today and you get a very different answer. For now, the most important job I will ever have is raising my Munchkin. 

Since the start, I have always known I did not want to be that strict, children should be seen and not heard, do as I say, angry parent that I experienced with my own father. I know the end result. I was a very unhappy teenager, who snuck out, experimented with drugs, drank and tried to fill a void.

During these teen years, I remember fondly my best friend Reagan’s parents, everyone loved her house, it was regarded as the “cool” house.  However, the reason was not because we got to do what we wanted or eat them out of house and home. It was the love we experienced.

One moment I will never forget. It was a Friday night and we wanted to go meet all the other teenagers at 7-11. Her parent’s were not having it, however their response dramatically effected me. Instead of the typical “Because…we said so that’s why you can’t go out”. I remember her Mothers answer like it was yesterday, looking into our pleading teenager eyes she said “We love Reagan and we love her friends and we just want you guys at home with us tonight….we want to be around you”.

That was so profound to me, how do you argue and get mad at being loved?
So that night everyone came over, her parents watched movies and visited with us. Over the years I watched as they practiced this in many ways with how they raised Reagan and her brother, and I always admired how close they were as a family.

I try to implement this technique with my daughter. Now she is just 7 so there is no “Going out” but I treat her with respect, kindness and love. I talk to her, we have conversations about things and if she does not listen there are consequences. However, I am not interested in barking or getting mad. I know I have the opportunity to make a change, to parent differently.

A quick example is the other night.  I had just returned that afternoon from being on the road all week and wanted to spend some time with her. I decided we would go to the newest kids movie, which she wanted to bring her friends, when I said “No” she started sulking. Part of me felt angry and annoyed but then I stopped.

I pulled her close and told her how much I missed her this week, how much I loved her. I explained that I really wanted to spend some mommy/daughter alone time. I simply expressed my love to her….

She immediately changed, told me she loved me and cuddled into my arms the whole movie.

Now lets be clear I am not saying that I will not get frustrated with her and angry from time to time. However, I also view her as my little teacher. She has taught me so much about who I am and who I want to be. I have explained to her that we are a team and a team works together. That we need to care, love and respect each other. If I want to change the cycle I need to be aware of my reactions and choices in parenting her.

My job is to support and help Mekaella rise into who she is supposed to be.  I know I won’t be perfect at it but being a conscious parent and using love over anger is a choice I have made.…


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Sunday, 27 September 2015


Most humans don’t like change. We try to avoid change and maintain what is familiar and habitual, even if it may not be in our best interest. Consistency and routine are what provide our lives with stability. I know I thrive on it. 
However, we all know that change is inevitable. We cannot move forward if things remain stagnant. This scary transition into the unknown is often the start of your next great adventure.
Losing a job, a loved one or a relationship, having a child, finishing your degree are life events that usually require change. Scientific research actually shows that our brains become wired with repetitive patterns. Once we switch to something unknown it takes time for the “fuses” in our brain now adjust and accept the new status quo.
During this transition is when we feel uncomfortable, even in pain, wanting to go back to what we know.. 
People learn by doing, reflecting, asking questions, looking at what is working and trying again. Sudden changes in life cause us to stop, step back and look at what we have been doing.  Seeking support and guidance from those who can challenge, care and offer some wisdom in the midst of change, enables us to walk through the difficult times. Combine this with listening to our “gut” or “inner voice” and it can be a time of personal growth and intention in the direction we want our lives to take. 

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Sunday, 13 September 2015

Bulimia to Balance Part 3....My Tools

In seeking treatment and strategies to gain control over my Bulimia I first began to reflect at the times when I felt most in control of my eating disorder.
I would like to say that at this time of this reflection I was not lost within my eating disorder. However, in my twenties, I was bingeing and purging multiple times each day. I know now that seeking some sort of outside help or support would have been a better choice.
Ironically enough it was when I started competing in Physique Bikini shows in my late 20’s the binging and purging compulsion subsided.  I had a very structured diet. I felt safe. I was eating healthy and my mind was at peace. It was after the show when the routine ended and I started eating everything that I tail spinned into my bulimic tendencies.
In my research, one of the treatments used for Eating disorders is Cognitive Behavior Therapy. Such tools as controlled eating, changing your inner dialogue, and positive body image are part of the treatment.
I made the connection between the CBT and my Prep life. While in “prep” mode I felt strong, I was satisfied with my healthy choices and I never felt the need to binge. I was positive, proud and motivated about what I was accomplishing.  Plus the fitness community is very motivating and encouraging.
 I then began to look at my trigger foods, what foods would set me into a binge. Processed foods were the highest on the list. I can tell you I never binged and purged on fruit or veg’s. Also when alcohol was involved, my inhibitions are lower and a binge also became more likely. 
When I am stressed I have often turned to food as a way to stuff my feelings. I must try to be present to whatever I am going through.  Taking the time to stop and listen to my body. Acknowledging and being aware has become part of my managing tools.
Allowing myself to be perfectly imperfect. Understanding that we all struggle with different things on our bodies. That's ok. Not obsessing, and being kind to myself not only reflect on my food choices but also the inner dialogue that plays in my head.
There is medication for depression and anxiety that is used in treatment. These are both common characteristics of those with an eating disorder. I had never thought I had anxiety until I began to reflect and think about my relationship with food. That is actually what kicks in once I feel I have eaten too much or my bulimic Aeryon voices kick in. I found a wonderful Anti-Anxiety natural supplement called Veeva that helps deal with that.
If I have an episode it does not mean I am a failure, or that I need to spin out of control. It means I am human. I pick up and move forward.
In summary, I use a variety of tools some of which were in front of me the whole time. I plan and prep my meals. I use positive body language. I forgive myself. I am aware of my trigger foods. Most of all I have learned to not be so hard on myself. I have learned that I do not need to be perfect.
I just need to take one step at a time and do my best in each moment…

If you are dealing with an eating disorder there are many amazing organizations out there for support:
You can google search in your area for the closest support network.
Here are some in the BC area.

VCH Eating Disorders Program: 
The Looking Glass Foundation:


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